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Drool <3 SeanPaul

SMiley Week!

Ja ja i know i only write here when i im sad n angry n got issues,but u see i dont have many post so i really dont have that much issues.

Nehows i can honestly say this week has been good,its true 'What doesnt kill you makes u stronger '

I feel stronger i can think clearer but im still undecided about where im heading in life and what im doing.I know im old already i should know these things but i dont.I have a new friend, a really sweet guy junaid,way younger than me but we get on really well and he's funny n entertaining n i enjoy being hes friend.My parents are gone to jhb for the weekend so its home alone tis weekend.Parrrty up!

Me n Angy watched 'My best friends girl' last night,Freaken hilarious seriously its da shit i really enjoyed it.

Butterflies

I can say that i do remember when last i had butterflies and it was this weekend...

I remember when i was younger i used to get it alot and when u see a guy u have a crush on or when something happends for the first time or unexpentantly.

This weekend after 2 weeks i saw my bfrend n i had butterflies and the strange thing is we both felt it...weird i know after going out with someone for 1 n half years.

i can say that love is hardest hing i had to endure my whole life its something that can make and break you and toy with your emotions,it sux if i had to do it over again i wouldnt fall in love ,im not strong enough rather not live on the edge and gaurd your feeling against these people that try and convince you otherwise.

365

Still sick this week went to the doctor said i had bronchitis,eish like i can be sick i hate it.
This week marked mine and sparky's 1 year relationship anniversary,pat on the back for me longest relationship to date.

Sat we went to see 'What happends in Vegas' Kewl movie lots of laughs n i love those 2 they quiet a couple.

TRraxx off the rails was so boring,wasnt feeling well and MarcT wasnt that hot .YAWNNNN......

Im never one to question what's to come or the future i always let things slip by and take each day as it comes,il never worry about an hour or a year from now,but what i have in front of me right now.

Last night my brother gave me n zai an asumption of our current relationships and well kinda put doubts in our minds about lots of things.Well after our talks, i had too much of doubts and questions,luckily for us our psychologist cousin paid us a visit and put our minds at ease.I think in future i will trust my own judgement.This morning i asked questions that still bugged me a bit and my answer went as follows:

"we dont know wat the future holds but we can create a future by living the present"

Neways i trust that everything will be what it's supose to be,i guess it's normal to be doubtful and insecure nothing is promised not even tomorrow.

Undefined

Somehow my plans for the last 3 days didnt work out as scheduled,the flu hit me from no where and practically disabled me.I hate this type of flu ,the one that makes u weak and makes u feel nauseus,like u on deaths doorstep.

Anyhows i got through it okay,with the help of Zai ofcos poking and pushing my head knowing im unable to defend myself,another thoughful thing i wont forget is when she got up in the morning and said "hey bitch are you okay",such love what more could i ask for.

Alas im back at work,almost all better and catching up on exam stuff to be sorted out.

On the relationship front :Defining a relationship

Okay so after lots of discussions amongst individuals,we trying to figure out how to define a relationship that that doesnt have a name.This is a day and age where not many young adults ask each other out its just a natural understanding that we are a couple and theres no need to say 'would you go out with me' ,its just an 'Understanding' between the two concerned.

You get:

Jolling -where you are kissing friends and you allowed to have others.

Friends with benefits -Where you are friends but undercover benefits are happening.

Bf/Gf -basically going out ,almost married type of situation.

So what do u call a commited relationship,where the understanding is mutual and consent for certain things are needed?

Everybody seems to be sitting on these types of relationship,undefined,i think it just gives space for trouble to let itself in and lots of hearts to be broken.

Almost There

Needs

As we grow up ,go through life experiences ,go through family problems,go through make ups and break ups and break ups.We sit back and assess our current relationships or our future prospects and decide what do we need.

We now have the knowledge ,the experience all gathered up in our head.We not young ,stupid ,naive and gullibe anymore ,we can say now this is what i want and im not settling for less,i can stand on my own two feet now,so u can't use or abuse or make me like or love you,im my own person.

Im talking relationship wise now,choosing who u wish to go out with,marry ,divorce or just spend qaulity best friend time with.Lots of us are going through this,is he/she what i need,can he or she give me what i want.

Everyone wants different things,some want unconditional love,some want to be taken care of,some want freedom,some need trust,some want all the good things in life,others want normality and happiness or plain down attraction.We each choose whats the most important thing to us.

Okay so u have these wants from the other person,but you too have to give something back -You have to sacrifice ,understand ,compromise you cant have everything you want your way always.Give and thou shall receive.

Making yourself happy is the most important thing,It sounds selfish,but u have to be,because everyone no matter what they do is to benefit themselves,you can argue that point but if u think about it the end result is selfinvolved and self absorbed.If u gave it a try and it didnt work out,fine stop trying pack your bags and move on.

Take the time to sit back and think before you throw away something you can never get back.This post is aimed at all my friends,in their own way each of them are going through assessing their relationships,the make and break part of it.

REALITY CHECK PEOPLE THE TIME IS NOW!!!!

with Love Envy

Ok so we evil ,a lil itsy bit evil.From all the hapenings of saturday night a lil cute bit of jealousy has stemmed,and well we just played it,which is very wrong but if guys want to carry on like 10 year old's it's their own thing,right.

Why is it that when another guy shows interest,then only the other guy wants to play all he's cards...go all out now that he knows he got competition,huloooo we not that stupid ok we are we just pretend like we are and go along with what you trying to pull off.But when a guy is jealous of another guy it's tooooo cute,shows how much you care for us.

Jealousy goes either two ways ,the person tries harder and feels competitive or gets totally put off.

Me if im jealous i tell it plain down and let me tell you i am,but if im not ill encourage you because i care about the person being happy.

Im not talking about girl on girl jealousy because to me that is a whole lotta bulldust and a waste of oxygen,Girls should getover it,go look in the mirror and fix your face and dress yourself ,then u have no reason to be jealous of the next person.

All True

I thought this was really funny and true.

#1 -True the more interest u show the more they dont want you,so make urself unavailable most of the time, but not too much of it becos then, you arnt thought of.

#2 -True we learn from our mistakes i think,guys dont do things for nothing,they either want you get in your pants or wanna use you for somthing else.

#3 -true,nice is Naaaaring,be nice when necessary and alone and when we want some induvidual attention ,but in public please show some manly traits.